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DDI Update at 3 1/2

Posted by --- on Wednesday 22 January, 2014

I’ve just read an old post of mine so decided to do a quick update on DDI.

She was 3 1/2 today and I’m still bescotted with her. She is developing well but I don’t “teach” her things as such. We just bring things into every day situations. She just picks it up when she’s ready. A bit like potty training. I asked her a couple of times if she wanted a potty and she said no. Then one day she got up and said she didn’t want to wear a nappy anymore and never had one on again. She had 2 accidents and never wet the bed at all!

She is now at nursery in a main school every afternoon for 3 hours. As it’s no local and we drive most of the way and walk the rest, it takes me about an hour to get her there – a quarter of an hour drive there, a quarter of an hour walk, and then the same back – repeat to collect her.  It was a nightmare getting her to go as she got extremely distressed when I left and didn’t calm down after half an hour like the say they do. The school decided it best (and I agreed) to start with half hour sessions so she knew I’d be coming back soon. She is still very much a mommy’s girl. She’s also still on the go all the time.  She will only go to sleep on me,usually around 9-10pm, and I then lie her in her own bed. She will wake at some point – sometimes only half an hour after putting her in bed, sometimes several hours later – and either come downstairs crying when she’s realised I’m not in bed, or toddle across the room to climb in bed with me. I am now single (long story) after discovering that DDI had been having an affair since shortly after DDI was born until he was caught when she was 2 1/2. He continued to see the OW for another 6 months and continued with his temper – losing it completely and threatening me on a couple of occasions. On the final one, I asked him to leave. It’s difficult and part of me is even considering a reconciliation but I’m not sure (I suppose that should be another post) Anyway, it means that DDI and I can share a bed without it affecting anyone else.
She is now closer to ES than she was, mainly because I encouraged the relationship when I thought we were reconciling. Also, now he doesn’t have the OW in his life or “working away” all the time, he can spend more time with her. Part of me resents her making a relationship with him after what he’s done as he doesn’t deserve her but she loves him and I wouldn’t deny her that. She still wouldn’t stay with him though and, if I’m honest, I’m relieved. I’d miss her terribly if she wasn’t here.

Back to schooling and after weeks of heartbreaking crying she is loving nursery now and can’t wait to go each day. She is making friends and told me today she’s invited 3 of them to come and live with us! I managed to get her a place in what was the best nursery in the county with outstanding results from Ofsted for many years running. It is over 3 miles away though and out of our catchment area so I think we’d struggle to get a full time school place. Also, its a worry getting her there. Most of the time I have the car but for the first time in the 4 years I’ve had it, it’s really let me down this year. It’s had to have new disc brakes and pads, new tyres, handbrake, alternator, battery and spent several weeks off the road with a parasitic drain problem which cost a fortune in auto electrician and garage charges. It means I worry now about transport and have to think how I’d manage with it for the next 9 years. So I’ve put her current school down as second choice to a local school that isn’t as good as far as I can tell but within walking distance.

She will love that I hope as she likes being outside. She loves to walk (half of the reason we park and walk to nursery as well as avoiding hte parking chaos that happens close to the school) and run. She often runs most of the way back to the car each day. She likes the things I do – gardening etc – and when I was setting up the brother today asked if she could have a knitting machine for christmas! She loves her food too but I still struggle to get her to drink. She doesn’t breast feed anymore but that was somehting I struggled to stop. I felt guilty stopping her but she was still having a night feed after she’d turned 3. I ended up refusing her and saying she was too big. She did cry a bit but I started taking a bottle of water to bed and offered that instead. I told her we’d still cuddle but not have any mommy milk and she only took a few nights to accept though she would try to sneak a boob if she thought i was asleep or turn to nuzzle if she was half asleep. I miss it in some ways but am glad its finished.

Oh oh. I hear footsteps upstairs. time to get up before the tears start…

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Clever little girl Nov 29, 2011 10:40 AM

Posted by --- on Tuesday 29 November, 2011

this is just a really fast post to say how quickly baby I is learning. She is now 16 months old and speaks quite well. She knows and says loads of words. Last week she surprised me by counting the ports on my computer! She counts to 5 regularly now.  She loves books and “reads” them herself by doing things like “eating” the fruit in the hungry caterpiller and saying butterfy at the end or doing or saying appropriate things with her different books. She can name many body parts, makes sounds for different animals – dogs bark, cows moo. I’m very proud of her. She is still a 24/7 little girl so I get nothing done now. We struggle getting her to sleep. If we’re lucky I can get her to have an hour in the day, but if she gets to late afternoon she is so tired she won’t stay awake but then will not sleep at all until midnight. She still sleeps with us and at night, has got into the habit of staying awake til I go to bed. I tried going to bed early but she normally wakes around 10 and won’t go back to sleep which is very frustrating as I’ve spent all night in bed.

I’m struggling with all of my kids at the moment. DDJ is always in trouble in one way or another. DSK just doesn’t come home when he should (he was 4 hours late home from school one night last week). DFS is still very temperamental and loses his temper over the slightest thing and I’m up and down with the rollercoaster that is my day to day life.

I keep meaning to blog it all but there are never enough hours in the day – maybe it will be my new years resolution for 2012!

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Posted by --- on Wednesday 15 December, 2010

I’ve discovered tonight that baby I has her first tooth! It is just poking through and i wasnt even certain that it was a tooth at first. she doesnt like me prodding about but after a mini battle, i confirmed that little white pearly tooty-peg! she is 5 months old today, weighed 14 9 and still hasnt developed a routine

foods so far shes tried are
cauli – not keen
carrot – not keen
sweet potato

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Bumbles, giggles and rice. week 17-18

Posted by --- on Friday 26 November, 2010

Baby I was 18 weeks on thursday this week and the day before, she started solids. She is still being breast fed and hasn’t developed any pattern. She is, on average, having a feed every 2 hours around the clock. I was hoping starting solids would reduce that but it hasn’t and I think I might leave her for another couple of weeks as she isn’t really enjoying the teaspoon of rice each lunchtime.

This week she has also started using her bumble nappies regularly; mainly due to running out of disposables. I’d bought a a stack of disposables when they were on offer but those she has left now are too big for her. I dug out the bumbles that she tried once or twice before and she seems to be happy with them. I’m happy with them. Apart from the fact that they seem bulky (which I like when I cuddle her!) they seem to be as good, if not better, than all the brands of disposables we’ve tried. So far pampers, huggies, tesco and asda’s own brands haven’t managed to contain baby I’s explosive baby poo but twice these nappies have managed it. My problem will be removing the stains as I haven’t managed to get the yellow stains out of her clothes yet either! I keep getting told that sunshine will take the stains out but I’ve left vests outside for three days in brilliant sunshine (yes, in the UK we did have more than one day in a row of sunshine!) and the stains remained. I now have one stained nappy outside – which has frozen stiff – in the very slim hope that a little sunshine might do the trick. If not I’ll try a hot wash. I bought a cheap fleecy blanket from the pound shop today that I’ve cut into 13 strips to use as liners so hopefully the staining wont be as bad on the nappy though breastfed babies poo tends to soak into the nappy. I wanted to use cloth nappies after reading about how many disposables are taken to the tip and sit there for up to 500  years! Apart from ecological reasons there are economical reasons too. In the long run, it works out cheaper to use reusables, especially, if like me, you purchase second hand. I’ll let you know how they go and if they’re as practical for someone like me that likes a simple, easy life!

This week I’m pretty sure she is giggling too. I thought she’d giggled before but I’m sure she has now. It’s impossible to get her to repeat it though I’ve tried everythign. When it happens its a throaty chuckle which I’m sure even surprises her by the look on her face but gets an instant burst of laughter and smiles from anyone around her.

She is still getting a lot of attention when we go out. An elderly lady in Asda stopped me this week to tell me she is one of the most beautiful babies she’d ever seen which was lovely to hear. Baby I always gets lots of ooh’s and ahh’s when we’re out especially when she’s in her sling as she was today. Living where we do, it is very rare to see a baby in anything but a pushchair. In fact, I’ve never seen anyone else using one. You see them all around town, the moms with their babies in matching colour co-ordinated buggy’s. They buy new ones just to keep up with fashion! I know a girl that has had at least 3 for each child purely because of fashion and then there’s me, with my little one snuggled up under my chin in her sling. The surprising thing is the reaction. i was expecting snide remarks like those I’ve received already such as “What’s that? A curtain you’ve slung around her?!” which was from a relative!  But no, many people are asking questions. I heard a dad telling his partner today that they should think of getting something like it for their little one as “I bet she’s lovely and warm in there!” which of course, she was. They’d spent some time trying to catch up with me to try to have a sneaky peak and I didn’t want to seem as if I was eavesdropping by dropping back to talk to them but they were most impressed. I don’t think many people around here have seen slings in use but I hope more people take to using them. I’d be lost without mine as she wouldn’t take to her pushchair in the beginning (still screams in her car seat every trip we make in the dark and some in the light too) and it was far easier when she was distressed to put her in her sling and take her out and about.  She loves being close to me, being able to see and I also think a lot of the attention she gets is because she’s up where people can see her, when they realise I’m carrying a baby that is.

She is still a difficult baby. I’ve struggled with her this week. I still can’t put her down to sleep and she sleeps very little in the day. She had three 15 – 25 minute naps through out the day today and  finally fell asleep on me around 10:30  this evening; she is on the sofa next to me and is fidgety.  Dad and nan have struggled with her this week with nan hearing her screaming cry for the first time when she looked after her when i went to the dentist and dad having her scream at him when i went to the shop for ten minutes and again, when I went to the toilet. She is getting worse. I cannot leave her. She wont settle in her moses basket and is sleeping in bed with us.I cannot get anything done and am finding it frustrating. I then feel guilty because it wont last and she’s only upset because she wants to be with me. I keep hoping it will get easier as she gets older.

nappy debate  links:

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I think I’ll go back to bed

Posted by --- on Wednesday 14 July, 2010

I wasn’t up late last night particularly – it was 3am which is 2 hours earlier than most nights – but I still didn’t get out of bed till 10:30. I didn’t know this at the time because the electricity had gone off and the clocks upstairs were flashing. no one was in the house (good job I don’t have an emergency – my due date is tomorrow and I’ve always been early so far so you’d think people would see that I was ok before going out…)

As per my normal routine, I put the kettle on, turned on the pc to boot up and headed to the bathroom. Came out and entered my pw on my pc, went to make the first of several morning coffee’s and noticed we only had enough milk for one.  I’d have thrown on some clothes but I went to bed with wet hair last night and I now have a massive nest of hair! Great! Made my coffee, went back to my pc and waited for Unhackme to finish its scans. Then tried to open up firefox and outlook which normally take around 10 minutes to load each morning (no idea why), so I picked up a magazine while I waited. I have an appt with the midwife at 12:15 but have no sample bottle so despite wanting to go to the loo, I have to wait so that I know I will be able to give a urine sample. Great! So my computer eventually loads its programs, I check my mail and see that decisions at the lotty are being done by one or two people again but give up. I log onto facebook and scan through the mornings updates – not much going on.  Then I put my straighteners on to heat up. I can’t remember the last time I used them! I hate how they’ve cut my hair this time anyway but again, I couldn’t be bothered to keep telling them.  On the second pass of the straighteners, I managed to put my index finger between the plates – how? No idea. I didn’t think I’d done much till i saw the 3x3cm roll of skin I’d burnt and scraped down. I turn on the tap and run my finger under it – it doesn’t hurt so I started to try to empty the cupboard looking for a dressing. We don’t have one so I have to try to make one with a bit of gauze and some of that papery dressing tape that I can’t remember the name of right now! it looks a real mess but it’s covered.  so it didn’t stick i put a dollop of savlon on and then realised that had been out of date for 2 years! Then I tried to put the box back in the cupboard (being heavily pregnant and short remember…) i knocked a bottle of calamine lotion which hit the work surface, I tried to catch it with one hand as it bounced but I missed and watched it hit the floor by my feet and as does anything breakable which hits this stupid tile floor, it shattered and scattered glass across the entire kitchen floor with a gloopy mess of calamine lotion at the impact point. Of course being pregnant (and I think my depression is kicking in again) this was a major catastrophe that reduced me to tears. I pulled myself together and dodging glass I went and fetched the sweeper and piled the glass into one area – getting on the floor to clean it up will be a nightmare I’ll leave till after my midwife appt. Then I try to finish my hair with a finger I can’t bend, standing 2 feet away from the work surface as my bump wont let me get any closer, and having not done it for ages and not knowing the style they’ve done, made it look straightish but still horrible. then my finger starts to throb and throb. The dressing is way too tight and rubbing in between my fingers making that sore too. I need to get dressed, I’ve got 15 minutes to be at my appt and it’s tipping it down of rain so my hair will frizz and curl as soon as I step outside anyway!
Lets hope the afternoon improves…

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Due date

Posted by --- on Wednesday 14 July, 2010

Baby is due in two days (well tomorrow as it has gone 1am now) but I’m not hopeful it will be over then. I’ve felt light headed and nauseous and have been vomiting tonight which can be a sign of  early labour – it could also be  a sign of eating 10 jaffa cakes! I’m dreading labour. You’d think after going through it twice I’d be a little calmer but I think this is the worst I’ve felt. I think it’s because I don’t want pethedine this time but scared I wont cope without it. I have an appointment with my midwife tomorrow. This one is better to talk to so I am going to discuss things with her. The other midwife just said “why, you’ve done it before?!” when i said i was quite nervous. SHe also told me I wouldn’t have the option of some of the things in my birth plan, including the pool as I am a high risk pregnancy and have been under the consultant. I have been a consultant patient because I had several miscarriages between my son and my twins and then I had twins. Obviously neither of these are an issue with this pregnancy so I can’t see why I can’t have what I want! I might not even want the pool when it comes to it but I want the option!

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decorating begins

Posted by --- on Friday 25 June, 2010

Gutted, I’ve been saving a diary using onenote and I opened the program today and it’s lost the last few days! Stupid computer!

Slept bad again last night. Gone 4 am when I finally went to sleep; I haven’t managed to stay in bed for more than 5 hours for months. I don’t sleep longer than an hour either (two if I’m very lucky). Heartburn is driving me nuts so I’ve been taking ranitidine for a week or more but I’m not sure it’s doing much. I’m already taking fexofenadine hydrochloride to help me breath and you have to take those 2 hours either side of heartburn tablets. I often forget to take one before 10 which means I have to wait and they both only last up to 12 hours. Emphasis on up to as they don’t last that long at all. I’ve also been suffering with this tooth. I know it’s mainly my fault as I had it filled at the hospital over a year ago and haven’t been to a dentist since. I wish I could control this fear! It hit me today though that it’s getting worse as it’s painful most of the time and the last thing I’m going to want to do with a newborn baby is suffer toothache too so I rang a dentist. As it happens they were shut! After I built up the courage too! That’s it till Monday now but I must remember to try them again. I’ve temporary filled it again but the filling drops out again after a few hours.

Started cleaning the paintwork on the stairs to decorate and dfs started the bathroom. Also scrubbed the whole kitchen with bleach solution and cleared all the nursing books from out of the bedroom. dfs has taken them to his sisters for his niece. It’s a bit gutting. They cost a fortune and nursing is a huge chapter (not intentional…) of my life I miss but can’t get back.


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sorry it’s been a while… first news

Posted by --- on Tuesday 15 June, 2010

Well it’s been ages since i last posted and lots has happened which I’ll probably post about seperately.  the first major thing is that on the 6th November last year I discovered that I’m pregnant!

Yes it was a shock for us too. We already have 3 children with large age gaps and I’m not a spring chicken but these things happen. Because of my age, previous miscarriage history and having twins before I’ve been monitored quite closely but it’s not been a fun pregnancy.  I’ve had vomitting (lost 1 1/2 stone), hypertension, kidney problems and suspected pre-eclampsia.  I’ve also got dysfunctional pelvic syndrome and been on crutches for some time. They’ve worried that the baby is too big and then too small – I think I have my name on a parking place at the ultrasound clinic! I’ve hardly slept for a few months and am now managing 2 hour stretches – at least we’ve worked it out so I can lie in bed; I was on the sofa sitting up and couldn’t cope with that! My feet and legs are so odematous they no longer look like my legs. I have heartburn, restricted airways, hemorroids and now they suspect pre-eclamsia again! Being my age, over-weight and unfit has meant that I’m worn out but we’ve now got to 35 weeks (36 on thursday) according to my scan dates so we’re almost there. My consultant wants me to be induced early because of my pelvis but we’re trying to hang on till the end! Oh and it looks like we’re having a girl.

this was the first test – sorry it’s blurred. I’ll post scan pics when I upload them.

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K ill

Posted by --- on Monday 24 November, 2008


DSK is off school! This might seem a small thing to blog about but it’s the first day off he’s had since he was “in yellow class” as he puts it(or year one for the rest of us) and he’s now in his final year (6) at primary school. He must feel ill! I took his temp last night which was 102, he complained of a headache, sore throat, tummy ache and his eyes hurt. He wasn’t complaining of a stiff neck, had no rash nor was he photophobic (light sensitive) which might indicate meningitis. I gave him 500mg paracetamol followed by a honey drink to help with the sore throat and compensate for the paracetamol and asked him to remove the extra clothing he was wearing because he felt cold. It was a battle to get him to have the paracetamol. When his stubborn side kicks in he’s a real pain. Afterwards, he was taking his own temperature so that he could see the effect of his treatment. My reasoning was that if he could see his temperature coming down as well as feeling the pain go away, it wouldn’t be so much of a battle for the next tablet – it didn’t work. I’ve no need to be concerned that we’ll go over the maximum dosage of 2g per day (4 tablets) he flatly refused the first 1g and had to be cajoled, bribed and threatened!
Ok, I threw in some scientific stuff here about fevers, homeostasis, negative feedback and the lipid nature of cells but decided to delete it. I’m sure if you really want to read about that type of stuff, you can look it up on the internet, get a book from the library or email me for some of my old homework!

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Posted by --- on Wednesday 7 November, 2007


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