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Posts Tagged ‘kids’

lots of updates! kids section

Posted by --- on Tuesday 7 October, 2008

I’ve decided to make lots of smaller posts of updates.

Ok Kids…

DSL is back home with us. I’m really pleased to have him here and don’t really discuss the issue of him going away. But already it is causing problems. He needs a bomb to get motivated. DFS is understandably frustrated at going to work to do a job he can’t stand to keep DSL (who incidently is a step son to him) in bed all day – literally. DSL is playing games most of the night, either on his laptop, ps3 or xbox live and will then spend all day (until tea time most days) in bed.  He will come down to get food or go to the toilet some evenings (if he’s in which mostly he is) and then go back upstairs. Some nights his friends are here too. He often eats half the food that has been purchased for DFS, DDJ and DSK’s lunches as night time snacks and has polished off any beer we’ve had in the house. It has caused rows already as DFS is getting more and more angry but instead of telling DSL, he is kicking off with me threatening to leave if DSL doesn’t get a job etc. I’ve told DSL who say’s he will get a job but then he sleeps all day. I’ve tried getting him out of bed but most of the time he wont.

DDJ is now settled at her new school. In the final year of junior school she has changed to a different one and I had plenty of reservations about it.  In the end I decided if she was really unhappy in her old school then things couldn’t be worse and her old school explained that she could return.  As it stands now, she would never consider it. She has small responsibilities at this school that she is happy with. She has jumped for level 6 reading to level 13 after an assessment. She is over the moon that this school think her hand writing is good enough to use pen as her old school made her use pencil. There are a million little reasons that make her happy at her new school and as far as I am concerned, being happy in school will make all the difference to her confidence, her learning and growth so I am happy too.  It is parents evening tomorrow so we can see how her teacher feels but we think she’s doing great! She has also started going to the local girl guides which she seems to enjoy too. After one week there she had a weekend camping trip at Beaudesert. A quick search on google bought this site up with pictures of guides at this camp site 50 years ago! Unlike DSK, she couldn’t wait to go which made it easier to let her go, although I still missed her like crazy! She was only away for the weekend and went with her friend and neighbour. There were only a few girls but she thoroughly enjoyed it and can’t wait for the next one.

DSK has stayed at the other school. We discussed it and left the decision with him and he decided after a trial day that he would rather stay where he was. DSK has recently returned from a camping trip to Standon Bowers. It was really hard to let him go especially as he didn’t want to. He is a homeboy at heart and hates staying anywhere else. We’ve had to go and fetch him back from relatives homes he’s gone to visit! He told me the morning he was leaving that he didn’t want to go, it took every bit of will power I had to stand on the edge of the road smiling and waving him off instead of bursting in to tears. Knowing he didn’t want to go and that he was only going because I’d pushed him to be with the rest of his year, I had all these scary recollections of motorway coach accidents running through my head. I@m sure it was his negativity rubbing off on me and guilt that it was my fault he was going when he didnt want to.  I could see he really didn’t want to be on the coach and as he gave a little smile back I had a terrible feeling of dread. I cried on the way home then made myself think straight and pull myself together.  Surely he would enjoy it once he was there and it would have been horrible for him to be the only one in his year not to go. How left out would he have felt when they all came back and he wouldn’t be able to join in the talks, share the experiences, and – as I’m sure they will – cover the topics learnt at school? I thought about him constantly all week and was clock watching for hours on the day he was due back. I think he enjoyed it although he hasn’t said much. He certainly wasn’t as full of tales as I thought he’d be so maybe, he didn’t really like it but doesn’t want to say.   At least he went though and for the first time ever, he spent a whole week away from home. He hugged me whenever he had chance when he came home but it didn’t take him long to turn on the black box (Ps3) and pick up a pad…. He still gave me cuddles whenever he walked past me. Like DDJ he has stopped going to Aikido. I was a little disappointed as he seemed to be doing well but he didn’t like the new Senseis that were training him. DDJ said one of them had hurt her and she wouldn’t go back. DSK didn’t feel happy with the new sensei and wouldn’t go on his own. DFS wanted to go and talk to the sensei that was training them originally to explain why they’d stopped going as he was really nice but so far, he hasn’t got around to it.

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Specsavers continued

Posted by --- on Friday 20 June, 2008

Well J went back for her 2 week check last Tuesday and I must say I’m impressed. I was dubious that she needed them before but now that her vision has improved I have to admit I was wrong. SHe is suffering from a lazy eye but the glasses are doing their job fantastically well and instead of having a follow up in 12 months, she can go back in 6 to review being weaned off them. I was so pleased. He said she is also long-sighted (as is my mom) and that she may need specs for close work but we’ll see.

I thought J would be pleased too but she “lost” her glasses the next day. Then on thursday night they turned up broken. I managed to superglue them but they broke again today. I’ll have to take them back to specsavers.

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Specsavers glasses

Posted by --- on Tuesday 10 June, 2008

After our trip to specsavers last week this has been playing on my mind.

To be honest, regular eye checks never entered my head. I thought most were done at school and left it at that. I remember we had them as kids. K. however, started complaining that he sometimes struggled to see the interactive white board so I booked up all in.

It was a mix up to be honest. J said before we went in that she was scared; I assured her there was nothing to be afraid of and said she would only be reading things or looking at pictures. We went in and waited for over 15 minutes after our appointment time before we were called to start pre tests (where you look in a machine at an air balloon and I had puffs of air blown in my eyes). After I’d had mine they asked me about our details and I was called away to fill in and sign forms. Note that I never leave my kids – ever! I hate not being able to see them at all times. That may seem paranoid or over defensive to you but that’s me. I don’t like it. I remember letting L go to the toilet at a supermarket when he was about 12 and some weird guy started getting too friendly with him – luckily L felt the questions he was asking him were too much and ran out.

Anyway, back to the opticians. While I was filling in all the paperwork the kids came back to me. At the same time as being asked all these questions for the records, the two optometrists came out and also started asking stuff so I was trying to answer questions from three directions! One of the optometrists suggested that as time was short, they split us up and I go in with one child and the other go with him. I wasn’t really happy but J said she was OK with it (after telling me she was scared!) I said that she was nervous before and I was surprised at her reaction which got a laugh and felt too silly to raise an objection then so I agreed.

So I went in with K and started having the test first so he could watch. Again, more questions, family history etc. Midway through my tests the other optometrist came in with J and started asking family history questions and he only just managed to stop himself telling me I should have had eye tests before now with a history of lazy eyes (amblyopia) on both sides of my children. He said something about suspecting she had it and that her vision wasn’t that good because she’d come back with negative readings on the air balloon machine. He asked if he could put some drops (atropine?) in her eyes to relax the muscles as they were compensating for her reduced eyesight? He said it would take around 50 minutes for the drops to take full effect and in that time, he sat her outside in the waiting room/shop (that has completely open front on to a busy town centre) on her own while I was in the room with K for the next 45 minutes! He did say something about her sitting in with us I’m sure but there was that much going on that it was overlooked – or maybe he didn’t and I imagined it. Either way I wasn’t really concentrating on the next lot of tests for K or I but I was trying to and trying to answer questions about K that were important.

The optometrist I was with was very good and I was very happy with him. K couldn’t read the bottom line of the test but he assured me that many people couldn’t and that it would not affect him in his life. He suggested a pair of glasses with anti-glare for K to help with his reading and computer work but very cleverly (without K getting the gist) told me that they were more like a confidence booster and hoped they’d work a little like Dumbo’s feather.

i was glad to be outside with J again. She was saying everything was very blurred with the drops in and her pupils were fully dilated. She laughed when we held up our hands as she said the fingers were all short and fat. Their friends from school were there so they wanted to chat with them. Then the optometrist called J back in. This time K was left outside so again I couldn’t really concentrate on what the optometrist was saying as I was half listening for K outside. The tests this optometrist did were different to the other optometrist. I’m not saying they were wrong but different. So I couldn’t compare the two. J couldn’t read the last line but neither could K. The optometrist said that her eyes were pretty bad and she needed 8x (??) glasses full time. J didn’t quite follow and I didn’t understand why. He said he wanted her to go back in two weeks for further tests (which I booked). I really don’t get it at all. She’s in the top group for literacy, she can read and write ok, she never complains that she can’t see things, nor do I see her squint. The school have never raised an issue either. I find it hard to see how her vision is so bad. When J realised that she would always be wearing glasses she was very upset. I tried to tell her it was very important and that they would help her but I’m not convinced. I don’t know whether to go somewhere else for a second opinion or what. At the moment I’m thinking of waiting until her next appointment (next Tuesday) and asking the optometrist to explain it completely.

Back at school and things aren’t going too well for her either. The optometrists said that she would need to rest her eyes after having the atropine in and not read or write or watch telly etc until the next day. They said it was probably best that she sleep which we laughed about because food and sleep are her favourite things! They also said her vision would probably be affected the next day and she may have difficulty reading the board at school. I wrote a note to the teacher to that effect and he was great about it. But this wasn’t her normal teacher. The next day her teacher came back and J lost her golden time to do home work she should have done. J explained about the eye test but he teacher said it wasn’t good enough. I know that she could have done it the night before but geez! Give her a break. Not only that but it didn’t take other kids long to jump on the name calling band wagon. As soon as they got wind of her wearing glasses – before she even collected them – she became “the four eyed freak”. Yesterday one boy defended her and I could hug him for it, making the other boy feel bad and apologise.

Funnily enough no one has said anything to K. As many of you are aware, they are twins. Since last year they have been in seperate classes but there aren’t that many in their year ( I’m sure less than 60) and the majority have been at the school since nursery age (3). They pretty much all know each other. J has never been quite as popular as K though and seems to get the rough end of the stick all the time. She does have a bit of an attitude problem but sometimes you wonder if that is the reaction not the cause…

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